Saturday, December 30, 2006

Life's early lesson?

I ordered some curtain from Bed, Bath, and Beyond, and they came in a box with a long piece of brown paper. Our 2 year old, M***, tore up the paper into a LOT of little pieces and threw them all over our bedroom. Today I asked her to come up and pick it up, she came up and our conversation went like this....

Me: M***, you made this mess so you need to pick it up.
M***: (holding her arm) I can't my arm hurts.
Me: Well, if you don't do it, your butt is going to hurt because I am going to spank a bum.
M***: (holding arm, still) I can't do it, my arm hurts. You do it.
Me: I didn't make this mess, so you can clean it up.
M***: Make C*** do it, my arm hurts.

Who taught her to do this? One of the older kids, I am sure. Great.....

Friday, December 29, 2006

New Year Wish List....

Well, now that the mass confusion of Christmas is over with... I would like to put out my wish list for next year in hopes that everyone can get a good deal sometime during the year, thus relieving the people that line their pockets every year with our hard earned money from any excess they might get from our family.

I want, sometime in the next year:

some Pampered Chef stoneware
a Kitchenaide with the plastic hood and chute so you can add ingredients without making a mess
another ring from QVC diamonique collection (I got a really nice one this year, love it)
stuff from Bed, Bath, and Beyond.
a white maltese male dog.... we all loved the one we had for a day.... especially me :)

So, there you go.... my family can keep their eyes open for some discount stoneware. Ryan can keep his eyes open for the other stuff. :)

I hope everyone got what they wanted for Christmas.... we had a great Christmas this year, and the MP3 players were a hit. Now I have a few birthdays coming up.... it never ends.....

Tuesday, December 26, 2006

maybe i ruined christmas?

I had to take an animal detail at work because the animal control officers get the holidays off. Just that night, during dinner, my children were asking me for a small dog like one we used to have. As fate would have it, the animal I had to pick up was just like it. It was adorable.

I had limited options as to what to do with the dog. I could not put it in the outside kennel we have for use when animal control is off. It was 9 degrees outside, and there are holes in it that a small dog can fit through. This dog weighs about 5 pounds.

I could not take it to the shelter, they are closed until Tuesday. And, I fell in love it, so I took it home. The kids are in love with it. I thought that our other dog would use it as a chew toy, but it has not.

The dog was well groomed and maintained, so I am sure that it belongs to someone who might have been out of town and may very well be looking for it. I have searched the lost and found ads, put up some pictures of it locally, and will contact the shelters tomorrow. If nobody claims it, we will keep it. If someone does claim it, my kids are going to be so sad, and so will I.

Sunday, December 24, 2006


I might have alzheimers, but I have to say this again because it kills me that people are so stupid. I have tricked people into admitting they have drugs on them by turning my pager off and then telling them that the pager is a drug detection device. I run it over their body, and then turn it on and it makes a beep. I then inform them that my detection device has indicated that there are drugs on the person.

The two times I have tried it, the person started crying and just told me where the drugs were. Of course, I only do it if I have enough probable cause to search them and their surroundings, anyway, but it makes me laugh that they fall for it. And, yes, it is legal for me to lie to them. And why not, they lie to me all the time, and unless it is about their identity, I can't do a thing about it. Turnabout is fair play?

feel like a woman.....

Well, I have to have a hysterectomy. First of all, I am not happy about the cost of the surgery, or the amount of work I will miss in the healing process. Second, it really makes me feel good when I inform a coworker why I am going to need 2-6 weeks off of work, and he replies, "I have always thought that you were a man. Now, what I say will be closer to the truth." I work with such sensitive guys. At least after he said that, he apologized and then he offered any assistance I may need during my healing. I think that I will call him any time I get a craving for something, just to teach him a lesson.

Oh well, there are some positive aspects of the surgery, but what a bummer.

Thursday, December 21, 2006

let it snow....

What I want to know is why is it that when I work, it pours the snows. As soon as I pull into my driveway, it stops snowing. It's ridiculous. Then, in the middle of a blizzard, I arrest a VERY intoxicated person for DUI, while in the hospital with him a woman asks me to look at her baby because "something isn't right." The baby was 9 months old and tested positive for methamphetamine, along with her and her husband also testing positive.

Then, they bring in an 8 month old my coworkers were dealing with. I informed the doctor that there was something suspicious about the story that father had told us. When the mother was wheeled by with her baby, she glared at me. I looked back at her once she was in the room, and she asked the nurses to close her curtain so I could not look at her. An hour later, the baby was taken by emergency transport to Primary Children's hospital. Apparentlyl, there were older injuries contributing to his problems.

Today, her husband confessed that while he had the baby in the bathtub, he shook it numerous times. Then, he took it out of the tub and slammed it face-first on the bed a few times. I feel bad for the other kids living in that home, and the baby. Both of these babies will spend their first Christmas in a foster home, as will the siblings of the latter baby. I tried to get them to let me bring the one baby home with me. :) But, instead, I had to take the drunk guy to jail. Makes me sad..... May God be with them now, and always.

Saturday, December 16, 2006

out of the mouths of babes.....

M*** is jumping on my bed saying, "look at me, Mom. I'm an octopus."
Me: "That's great honey."
M*** walks over to me and says, "come on whale, let's go."

Whale? Why do I have to be the whale? Why not a shark, or a dolphin? What a self-esteem booster.

Friday, December 15, 2006

i need a hero.....

I finally got to be a hero at work, rather than the bad guy. I usually get blamed for all the bad stuff people do, but the other day I actually had a good ending to a story.

I got a call of a missing 5 year old boy. The parents said they had just moved here two weeks ago, and their 5 year old has been missing for 45 minutes. They feared that he had walked out the front door. The mother was running around the neighborhood, looking for him. I had other officers come with me to look around. I met with her, and she is frantically yelling his name and crying. (as I would have been, too) I asked her if anyone was at home and if they had checked the house well. She said that her husband was home, and they checked the house 6 times. I assured her that he was in the house, and I went to the house while everyone else looked around.

The dad was at the house, and assured me that they had stripped linens off of beds and thoroughly checked the house. I informed him that we were going to check again, and asked where he had last seen the boy. He said he was upstairs, so we began looking upstairs. He was not in the bedroom. There was a playroom full of rubbermaid containers. I asked him if he had checked each one, and the father said he had. I asked about the one in the corner that was hard to get to, and he was sure he had checked it. I told him to check again, and I began to move lids and check the ones closer to me. He moved the one in the corner around, then moved on.

I pointed back in the corner and told him to check again. The container in the corner was not only harder to get to, it had a cardboard box on it and three lids on top of that. I kept feeling something drawing me to that corner. I heard the father yelling "Ja**, OMG Ja**" but the boy was not moving. The dad was holding his daughter, so he grabbed the boy by the shirt and lifted him out. He was limp and unresponsive. His eyelids started to flutter, and he was pasty and wet. We ran him outside for some fresh air as I called for medical to respond.

Medical put a pediatric lifeflight on standby. The boy was hard to wake up and keep awake. As more time passed, he became more alert. The paramedics checked him over, and said that his oxygen stats were a little low, but improving, so they cancelled the lifeflight. They said it was good thing that we found him when we did. A little longer without oxygen and he would have had some life-altering consequences, including death.

I honestly believe that it was divine intervention that night. I am thankful that, for once, I can reminisce about a happy ending.

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

What I like about you...... you make me warm inside....

Well, I was reading Native Minnow's post regarding things about him, so I thought that everyone could laugh at some stupid things about me:

-I nearly cry when I hear the national anthem.
-I don't like chocolate, though I will eat it if I am desperate for something sweet.
-My favorite place on the earth is the beach. I hate cold weather and snow, yet I live where it does both of those often!!
-I used to be a ballet dancer.
-I hate liars more than anything.
-I see a lot of things at work that would make normal people cry or puke, and I usually do neither, and that bothers me......
-Sometimes, I am an awful listener.
-I am so forgetful, I am afraid that I am getting alzheimers already.

Well, I have bored you enough...... my life really isn't very interesting...

Saturday, December 09, 2006

never a day off....

Well, I have some days off coming.... but it seems like they are never days off. Today I get off at 0630, but I have to be ready to take my girls shopping at noon for Christmas stuff, be at a Ward Christmas Party that lasts from 2-7PM, then make time to get some haircuts and have someone pick up my old headboard out of my house. I also promised someone that I would call them so that we "adults" could finish Christmas shopping. I guess that is out of the question.

I have to get something for my niece's birthday so I can get that mailed. Otherwise, I will miss her birthday. Sunday is church and an appointment for tithing settlement.... so maybe I will get the adult shopping on Monday? I wanted to go to the temple on Tuesday, but we will see how that works out...... I will probably get called into work. :(

Tuesday, December 05, 2006

life is mundane....

You know that your life is boring and mundane when it has been nearly a week since your last post, and you have NOTHING even remotely interesting to say.......

How pathetic is that? All I have done, lately, is work. I am hoping that in January, I can take some days off.....

Sunday, December 03, 2006

i like big butts, and i cannot lie......

OK, I don't really like them, but the song comes to mind after the health assessment that my work made my husband and I do the other day. The incentive was that they would take $250 per person off of our deductible.

We found out that our body fat composition put us up in the national obesity level. I am fatter than I have ever been, without being pregnant. My waist is 5 inches larger than normal. My cholesterol is high, and my husband has similar issues. That just made my day......

Well, now I am depressed. I am going to have to stop drinking soda and start working out again. I DO get paid to work out..... so I should probably do it. I will try to lay off the donuts.